N — Name
“I can see this is a heavy blow”
Putting an emotion into words already acknowledges it.Be able to notice and name emotions and respond to them with empathy, not with facts.
Emotions: the most important step
E — Emotions (NURSE)
After the news comes the reaction — shock, tears, anger, numbness, silence. This is the moment of truth. The instinct is to fill the pause with facts and a plan. But you have to respond to the emotion first, or the person won't hear you anyway.
An empathic response = notice the emotion + name it + connect it to its cause + allow a pause. The NURSE technique helps — five moves in the cards below.
Sometimes the best response is silence and presence. A pause of a few seconds says more than ten phrases.
NURSE: five empathic moves
U — Understand
“I understand why you're in shock”
R — Respect
“You're holding up, and that isn't easy”
S — Support
“We'll get through this together — I'm here for you”
E — Explore
“What scares you the most right now?”
Lesson notes
E — Emotions (NURSE)
After the news comes the reaction — shock, tears, anger, numbness, silence. This is the moment of truth. The instinct is to fill the pause with facts and a plan. But you have to respond to the emotion first, or the person won't hear you anyway.
An empathic response = notice the emotion + name it + connect it to its cause + allow a pause. The NURSE technique helps — five moves in the cards below.
Sometimes the best response is silence and presence. A pause of a few seconds says more than ten phrases.